There have been many posts out there about the best way to tackle the friendzone but I’ve noticed the authors are usually males. Here’s my take on how to get out of the friendzone, from a female perspective.
“All I want is a good guy”
In your lifetime you will hear this phrase uttered by females countless times. Do not fall for the joke. While no female wants to be treated badly (unless they have some issues), everybody – guys and girls prefers someone with a little bit of an ego which somehow translates into self-respect and standards. ‘Nice’ guys are too agreeable, they go with the flow to the point where it’s boring and makes it easy for females to walk all over them – and they will, if you don’t set some boundaries.
“We all want what we can’t have”
It should be pretty obvious, but it’s also easy to forget. Have other things going on. In short: GET A LIFE. Girls like it (even the girls those who come across as wanting to be in your space 24/7). People who are passionate about activities other than hunting down people of the opposite gender are perceived as less needy and neediness is the least attractive quality in any gender. That being said, don’t play too many games, you’ll only end up playing with yourself.
Every girl likes a boy who can make her smile and feel good about herself without coming across as a total groupie. So if she catches you checking out her out just be confident and say you couldn’t resist. Be self-assured and in control of yourself. Become aware of your own fidgety and awkward body language (like shuffling your feet, slumped shoulders or avoiding eye contact) and learn to keep it in check.
One of the major reasons why a guy gets put into the friend zone is because he waited too long before he revealed his intentions. Don’t be a statistic! Not making your move as soon as possible sends out the message that you are not confident enough. Low confidence = instant buzzkill. On the other end of the intention spectrum, don’t formally introduce her to your family as your girlfriend on the second date, although I’ve noticed this is normal practise amongst certain nationalities so I guess some other girls might be into it.
Don’t try to be Dr Phil
Do not become the shoulder to cry on – at least until you are dating her (if ever) as this will lead to you becoming that guy who she eventually talks to about dating problems - with other guys. By playing therapist you are totally disqualifying yourself as a potential dating option.
Lastly, if you make your move or ask her on a date, and a girl says anything other than“yes” yeah or some variation thereof, it’s a no. Believe her when she says she just wants to be friends. Accept it and move on. Refusing to accept “no” will just make you come off as desperate and take you from the friend zone to the psycho zone. Don’t be that guy.
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